Author Topic: New Releases - December 7th 2019  (Read 6866 times)

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Offline wizzy

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #25 on: December 09, 2019, 12:47:20 pm »
Wish Fulfillment appears to have been removed?
Yes it disappeared very quickly. Duckduckgo had an entry but not a cache.

Offline Shadra

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #26 on: December 09, 2019, 07:12:03 pm »
Wildwood creeps closer to the finale it seems. At this point I wish I could just read it already! I know how I want it to end, but with the way things are going in the story it's hard to imagine how that could be achieved. I'm sure the author has something up his/her sleeve, and I hope it comes through well.

The Internship is a little less overt with the mind control than I prefer (obviously personal preference, yadda yadda), but I was still enjoying it. And then it got to that last scene at the main character's home. I'd definitely say that the scene kicked the story up a notch! No idea what's in store for the remaining seven chapters, but the ending to this one made me certain I'll continue to read.

Lastly, The Witch, The Whip, His Wife and Her Lover. I think the author and I need to have a word about the length of his titles! I was excited to read this one, given how much of a gem his first story was. Unfortunately, parts of the story were rather stacked against that. Politics of any kind is quite the turn off, and male sub in general is just difficult for me to find interest in, though not impossible! That said, I would wager that people that prefer male sub would greatly enjoy this. I think certain aspects of the story, such as the use of colors, was fantastic. Quite frankly, if the main character was female, I probably would have loved it, maybe even with the politics. So yeah, still going to say great job. Fingers crossed that the next story is a bit more to my taste. (Not that you should be writing for me, of course.) I'll likely be reading it regardless.

Offline walter_kovacs

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #27 on: December 10, 2019, 01:40:44 am »
Lastly, The Witch, The Whip, His Wife and Her Lover. I think the author and I need to have a word about the length of his titles! I was excited to read this one, given how much of a gem his first story was. Unfortunately, parts of the story were rather stacked against that. Politics of any kind is quite the turn off, and male sub in general is just difficult for me to find interest in, though not impossible! That said, I would wager that people that prefer male sub would greatly enjoy this. I think certain aspects of the story, such as the use of colors, was fantastic. Quite frankly, if the main character was female, I probably would have loved it, maybe even with the politics. So yeah, still going to say great job.

Hey now, I think there have even been longer titles in some of the same updates I posted in :angel:

I'm glad you found things to like in it despite not being your normal kind of story. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Quote
Fingers crossed that the next story is a bit more to my taste. (Not that you should be writing for me, of course.) I'll likely be reading it regardless.

Fsub is my main thing, so I hope it will be too! Speaking of, time to go get stuck in.

Offline Pan

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #28 on: December 10, 2019, 01:54:33 pm »
The Internship and May I were both great. I sent May I to someone I'm seeing, because I'm fairly sure it'll be a huge turn-on for her.

I also loved Rachel's Love Potion. Really great world-building and setup. I felt like the execution felt slightly flat, but I honestly couldn't tell you why - I think a POV switch to Rachel at that point would have been what I was looking for, but I'm certainly not complaining. Really great, hot tale. :)
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Offline StoryFan

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #29 on: December 10, 2019, 03:04:04 pm »
Since we are talking about greyscribbler I just checked out Amy a Lawyer from 2011c
really really good.

Offline fumanchu

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #30 on: December 10, 2019, 09:51:30 pm »
How does 321’s “Hostel” keep getting better, growing in length and complexity without losing momentum.  321 is putting on a clinic.

“The Great Trancini” might be my favorite character name this year.
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Offline Ice Bear

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #31 on: December 11, 2019, 02:58:06 pm »
I also loved Rachel's Love Potion. Really great world-building and setup. I felt like the execution felt slightly flat, but I honestly couldn't tell you why - I think a POV switch to Rachel at that point would have been what I was looking for, but I'm certainly not complaining. Really great, hot tale. :)

Thanks, and agreed re:PoV. I'll be releasing the next few installments over the next few updates, in which I did just that.

Offline Pan

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #32 on: December 11, 2019, 06:27:44 pm »
Oh I wasn't expecting more! I had figured that story was finished.

Bonus chapters! :D
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Offline gyrd

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #33 on: December 11, 2019, 10:53:58 pm »
I too thought "Rachel's Love Potion" had ended.

Offline greyscribbler

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #34 on: December 12, 2019, 02:32:59 pm »
The Internship is a little less overt with the mind control than I prefer (obviously personal preference, yadda yadda), but I was still enjoying it. And then it got to that last scene at the main character's home. I'd definitely say that the scene kicked the story up a notch! No idea what's in store for the remaining seven chapters, but the ending to this one made me certain I'll continue to read.

Thanks Shadra.  I have to admit my writing does tend towards the slow burn. *cough* Fair Share *cough*.   I do wonder what you'll think of the first scene in part 4.  Hopefully you'll like it

Greyscribbler

Offline greyscribbler

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #35 on: December 12, 2019, 02:35:25 pm »
The Internship and May I were both great. I sent May I to someone I'm seeing, because I'm fairly sure it'll be a huge turn-on for her.

Thanks Pan.  Hope she enjoyed it.

Greyscribbler

Offline greyscribbler

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #36 on: December 12, 2019, 02:37:18 pm »
Since we are talking about greyscribbler I just checked out Amy a Lawyer from 2011c
really really good.

Thanks StoryFan. It doesn't feel that long ago.  Maybe I should do a sequel forit's 10th anniversary?  There was Amy's colleague...

Greyscribbler

Offline mr potestas

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #37 on: December 13, 2019, 09:00:26 pm »
Xhalation (mc ff) (new)  by Jukebox
Sarah is exposed to a new drug via secondhand vapor and it blows her mind.

Not only is this timely with those secondhand vape devices causing issues, but also drug MC can be quite fun if done right. Who better than Jukebox to take on the theme? There was a rather amusing level of realism in how the Goth Chick acted. There is a very distinct behavior many of those vape users exhibit. It is as if they were somehow better, because they were not smoking the old-fashioned cigarette. They just don't seem to care in some ways. At the same time, one does sometimes wonder what exactly that mist coming from those pens really is. Anyway, perhaps this was a bit mean spirited. Maybe a little. But it was so well written that it didn't matter. It did not really matter that it was a vape pen as the MC medium. All we ever do on the MC Archive is work to get a dose of that good old MC. And sometimes, we get to enjoy flavors we don't normally look for.

Offline StoryFan

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #38 on: December 13, 2019, 10:21:45 pm »
Since we are talking about greyscribbler I just checked out Amy a Lawyer from 2011c
really really good.

Thanks StoryFan. It doesn't feel that long ago.  Maybe I should do a sequel forit's 10th anniversary?  There was Amy's colleague...

Greyscribbler

Sounds fantastic!

Offline 321

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #39 on: December 14, 2019, 01:02:38 pm »
Thanks for your kind comments on Hostel, CerebusOne and fumanchu!

Online MCaesar

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #40 on: December 19, 2019, 11:10:56 pm »
It's Day-Old Thoughts On Week-Old Stories! This time is Zack and Millie.

A pleasant little story. The "flash-present" sections (where events while Millie is in trance occur in italics) are a neat device. And the introduction of the shopkeeper character with some mysterious past with Zack has been an intriguing addition.

I am a little curious when it's going to... "kick in," so to speak. There's a sense that the plot is building toward something, but there's not really any sense of what that might be. Besides "now Millie is now completely enslaved." Just replace the words "personal assistant" with "slave" in her head, and you've basically done it. She hasn't really been fighting or resisting at all. There are piles of stories that consist of a single scene of enslavement, and I don't really miss it when it lacks dramatic tension or a deeper plot. As I said, this one has been pleasant, like a nice stroll in the park, but after 10k words, I'm hoping for a little more excitement. Or I'll adjust my expectations.
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Offline scifiscribbler

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #41 on: December 20, 2019, 01:40:51 am »
It's Day-Old Thoughts On Week-Old Stories! This time is Zack and Millie.

A pleasant little story. The "flash-present" sections (where events while Millie is in trance occur in italics) are a neat device. And the introduction of the shopkeeper character with some mysterious past with Zack has been an intriguing addition.

I am a little curious when it's going to... "kick in," so to speak. There's a sense that the plot is building toward something, but there's not really any sense of what that might be. Besides "now Millie is now completely enslaved." Just replace the words "personal assistant" with "slave" in her head, and you've basically done it. She hasn't really been fighting or resisting at all. There are piles of stories that consist of a single scene of enslavement, and I don't really miss it when it lacks dramatic tension or a deeper plot. As I said, this one has been pleasant, like a nice stroll in the park, but after 10k words, I'm hoping for a little more excitement. Or I'll adjust my expectations.

Glad you're enjoying, if on a chilled out stroll-in-the-park level.

For what it's worth: For me, the journey in this story isn't Millie's. Which may be clear after the final chapter, or I may have missed my mark.
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Online MCaesar

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #42 on: December 20, 2019, 02:42:47 am »
Glad you're enjoying, if on a chilled out stroll-in-the-park level.

For what it's worth: For me, the journey in this story isn't Millie's. Which may be clear after the final chapter, or I may have missed my mark.

I think I can get behind that. Been reading some "battle-of-wits" and "cat-and-mouse" stories lately, and been trying to pick them apart, and the progression of enslavement and the struggle between controller and victim are often the big conflict there. The high stakes and uncertainty I've been slurping up with those have probably colored my view a bit.

But if you're saying what I think you are, I do think I've got a bit better of a handle on it now. :)
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Offline scifiscribbler

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #43 on: December 20, 2019, 07:31:27 am »

I think I can get behind that. Been reading some "battle-of-wits" and "cat-and-mouse" stories lately, and been trying to pick them apart, and the progression of enslavement and the struggle between controller and victim are often the big conflict there. The high stakes and uncertainty I've been slurping up with those have probably colored my view a bit.

But if you're saying what I think you are, I do think I've got a bit better of a handle on it now. :)

I mean, fair's fair, you may come out of Chapter Four with the same issue. I won't claim to be a perfect writer.
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Online MCaesar

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #44 on: December 20, 2019, 07:49:32 pm »
A buzzer-beater for Day-Old Thoughts, and it's for Dead of Night.

Here's my progression going through this story.
Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

While the ending might not have floated my particular boat, overall I was pretty riveted. The characters all rang very clear, and the prose really flowed. I liked it almost as much as I liked Kat and Mouse, which I liked a lot, though I didn't finish it in time to give timely feedback. Both had me on the edge of my seat.

Since I mentioned Kat and Mouse, just wanted to say (again) that it was a phenomenal story. It felt super grounded and the tension was so thick it was actually nauseating for me at times. Which is a good thing, I think. Well done. I really want sequels where Kat and Marisa become consultants or PIs and solve mind control cases for the FBI, or something like that. That would be dope.

And speaking of both stories, the biggest issue I have with both of them is that both are very lacking in eroticism to me. Dead of Night moreso. The hypnosis rarely comes off as sexy, seductive, or titillating. It's a device that supports the plot and the tones of uncertainty and fear. Supports them very well, I'll readily admit. Even in Kat and Mouse, where the two characters have an erotic relationship with hypnosis to start, the plot twists and perverts it, and not in a fun way. Compelling, but not in the sexy way I come to this site for. It very well could be that forcing more erotic elements into either story would have compromised the overall vision, but I'd love to see one that includes them organically.
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Offline fascinated

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #45 on: December 21, 2019, 10:32:12 pm »
And speaking of both stories, the biggest issue I have with both of them is that both are very lacking in eroticism to me.

This is a totally valid criticism of my work. My theory is that is you have likable characters and an engaging story, almost any use of hypnosis becomes sexy as a result. But I understand when the occasional reader does not see it that way.

I'm working on a couple of stories right now that I am trying to make more overtly erotic. But my guiding principle is, and always has been, "write what would turn me on," and it's worked out pretty well so far.

Online MCaesar

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #46 on: December 23, 2019, 01:23:35 pm »
Totally get that. More than one author or critic has said "hypnosis itself is sexy." I get about halfway there most of the time, but the rest depends on the way the MC is treated by the author. Even if it doesn't involve explicit sex, some scenes have that heat and some don't. And obviously that can vary quite a bit from person to person.

That's not to say you didn't do it well. Your scenes were almost all intense to some degree, and often intimate. I just didn't find them super hot. It's difficult to articulate why without rereading them both again.

If they're hot to you, though, you keep doing you. Mad respect to any artist who knows what they like and likes what they do. Sincerity is always more rewarding than chasing the fickle whims of the faceless masses. Now, where did I put my face... ;)
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Offline BethanyP

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Re: New Releases - December 7th 2019
« Reply #47 on: December 23, 2019, 02:20:38 pm »
I'm enjoying this particular bit of conversation, thank you both.  I had my own thoughts on both Kat and Mouse and Dead of Night, with the former still one of my very favorite short stories in a long time.  Neither story felt overtly erotic but in the case of Kat and Mouse the sheer intensity more than made up for it - I don't know that a permeating sense of dread is or isn't erotic but it began to feel that way at least to me.  Dead of Night was didn't quite have the same intensity for me and I'm not sure why - it's occurred to me that the inclusion of the villain's perspective in the narrative might have done quite a lot to enhance the menace of Kat and Mouse; Dead of Night felt more like a mystery tale by comparison though I one I much enjoyed.