New Releases-September 28th 2019

[ElmerFudd]

(NOTE: You can QUOTE this posting, and then copy each set of <Title, Link, Tags, Colors and Description> in one chunk, for use in your review postings here)


You can now download the BBCode version of the What’s New page at https://mcstories.com/WhatsNew.txt

Algorithm (mc ff mf fd md) (1 new chapter)  by Carefully Random
Tiffany’s friends discover the mind blanking capabilities of an audio visual sensory input algorithm.  It isn’t long before they want to know how powerful the algorithm can be, but they will need test subjects: willing or otherwise…

The All-Seeing Eye (mc mf) (new)  by Anostus
Jennifer’s office life is about to be turned upside down.

Alter-Right (mc mf fd) (new)  by Ozhojabbe
Ethan eats, breathes and sleeps the Intellectual Dark Web, but Cassie might have something to say about that.

Binding Rings (mc mf md in) (1 new chapter)  by Sidia
A chance discovery changes a young man’s life—and not always for the better.

Blood on Parchment (mc ff) (new)  by Doctor D.
Alderose’s husband-to-be has been missing for several weeks. Though no one believes her, she’s pretty sure he’s been taken by another woman. Or a monster. She isn’t too sure.

Campfire (mc mf) (new)  by MoldedMind
Liza asks Travis if the rumours that he is a hypnotist are true. He goes above and beyond to prove that they are.

Cats and Dogs (mc mf md) (new)  by Hemaccabe
In the none too distant future, a genetically gifted man decides to recruit and train a new pet.

Corruption Games (mc mf fd) (1 new chapter)  by S. B.
Alexandra Ryder—a.k.a. Agent 47-D—is back and this time it’s personal.

Dick Picture Perfect (mc mf ff) (1 new chapter)  by Redsliver
Will sends a dick pic to a girl, knowing that she would hate it. But it turns out that every woman who sees that picture needs more of it.

The Doctor Is In (Anonymous-047) (mc ff) (new)  by Anonymous-047
A doctor is tuned into a an ignroant dumb sex beast by spirit guides.

Editing Reality Book Three: Naughty Fantasies Unleashed (mc mf gr in) (1 new chapter)  by mypenname3000
Steve gets a phone app that lets him edit other people.

The Girls of S.L.E.E.P. — N.C.U. (mc ff) (1 new chapter)  by Sleepy Hypno
Rayne, Trisha, Laura, and Eve get set up for the first meeting of the hypnosis sorority, Sigma Lambda Epsilon Epsilon Pi.

House of Hypnosis (mc ff) (new)  by Rhea Corvos
Alice and her realtor look at a house that might be haunted.

I Hate My Master (mc mm) (2 new chapters)  by maxrpotter
Mark moves in with a new roommate, and finds himself getting annoyed by a few small things about him, like when he leaves dishes in the sink, or when he leaves his clothes around the place, or when he gives Mark orders that he is unable to disobey.

Incubus (mc mf ff md) (1 new chapter)  by Jennifer Kohl
Christina summons a demon, who has the ability to grant her greatest desire.

Jennifer Lost the War (mc ff) (new)  by Jukebox
Shelly comes home to find her old friend waiting for her... but Jennifer, it seems, wants to be more than just friends now.

Looking at Her Differently (mc mf fd) (new)  by HypN00b
The author experiments with erotic hypnosis. A real-life hypnosis transcript.

Massaged By My Nerdy Brother (mc mf md in) (1 new chapter)  by BurroGirl18 and Pan
A few innocent massages with her brother go too far.

Master PC — Conditional Slavery (mc mf md gr) (new)  by Yaya
A strange man wants Heidi to be his slave. She refuses, but he has some conditions to offer that are quite irresistible.

Master’s Marks (mc mf mm md ma hm ds ex ft) (new)  by Third Leprechaun
A young man with a mind control device and a penchant for humiliation finds ways to keep himself entertained.

Miswish: Eternal “Hall Pass” (mc mf) (new)  by Anostus
Ethan gets the relationship break he’s been wishing for. More or less.

A New Treat (mc ff) (new)  by SleepyTimeSlut
Two 18-year-old girls find that trick-or-treating isn’t quite the way they remember.

On a Train (mc ff) (new)  by Greyscribbler
Linda encounters a stranger on the train. Her life won’t ever be the same.

Packback (mc mf ff fd in ft bd) (1 new chapter)  by MɛtaBob
Lust, love, and renewal on the Pacific Crest Trail.

Pact (mc ff) (new)  by Meleva
Truth has tried for twenty years to live quietly, to tend her farm, to forget all about the Pact that she was born to obey and bound to enforce. But an urgent need will pull her back to the magic that she’s spent so long seeking to abandon.

Poetry & Blood (mc ff) (1 new chapter)  by Trixie Adara
Laura gets a new job for a strange romance writer that seems to be too good to be true.

Principal of Revenge (mc mf md) (1 new chapter)  by Alyce Moore
Devon uses his knowlege of herbology and natural medicine to concoct an elaborate revenge on his high school.

Properly Handled (mc mf ff md fd in) (2 new chapters)  by ExodusRex
A brother and sister grow closer over a shared love of mind control and other various kinks and perversions.

Room With a Secret (mc mf md) (1 new chapter)  by Maximilian Cummings
Young ladies don’t know or can’t remember a room that makes their minds so open to suggestion.

Salem’s Hot (mc mm mf md) (new)  by Chrysostomon
Horny vampires propogagte in a small town.

Savannah’s Hypnotic Socks (mc ff ft) (2 new chapters)  by Fibaro
A co-ed gets a pair of hypnotic socks that she uses on her roommate.

Short Stories (mc mf) (new)  by Anostus
A collection of short stories: Dr. Eddings gets help emptying her mind, Procrustes Inc. always finds a job that’s a perfect fit, and Dana and her sisters only have one brain to share between the three of them.

The Silken: Family Counseling (mc mf mm ma in ft) (1 new chapter)  by Templeton Rose
A rogue psychiatrist mends a mother-son relationship by turning both into incestuous, pantyhose sex slaves.

Simplify Your Life — Trading Up (mc mf ff md fd ma in bd ds ex hm gr ft) (1 new chapter)  by Raptor4d4
Gold-digger Sharon Holmen has finally decided to trade up and ditch her wimpy husband and deadbeat daughter on the even of her husband’s latest job interview. But four years later...who was the one really trading up?

Smoke and Drums: The Scout (mc mm ma hm bd ds ex sf) (new)  by Nicky Noxville
Orcs have invaded; an Elven Army scout investigates.

Split Slave (mc ff ma bd ds hm) (1 new chapter)  by Skaetlett
Delta, a non-binary, kidnapped sex slave with a protective alternate personality, gets auctioned off to a multimillionaire who seems to have more in store than they’re ready for. Their Mistress thinks she knows everything about them and is wrong.

Succubus’ Folly (mc mf md) (new)  by Anostus
Spectra is an ancient and powerful succubus. What chance does an apprentice summoner have against her?

There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee
After a system update at work, Jenna starts to notice the increasingly unusual behaviour of her coworkers.

Trapped (Mr. Scade) (mc ma ft) (new)  by Mr. Scade
She had trapped herself many years before, when she fed her fantasies and fetishes. She had become trapped, when the sight and smell and even thought of latex aroused her. She was trapped in this suit that kept changing, her, her mind, her life. Trapped and unable to escape. The latex was taking more and more of her.

Where Everybody Knows Your Name (mc mf md) (new)  by Chrystal Wynd
Welcome to The Electric Raven, where anything can happen and usually does.

White Pineapple (mc mf md in hm) (1 new chapter)  by All These Roadworks
A mysterious stranger has learned Jaclyn’s hypnotic trigger, and compels her to make a series of choices.

Wildwood (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by notorioushypno
A mind control conspiracy spawns small-town hokum, entangling a group of plucky university students, some deadbeat locals, and a team of federal investigators.

[Majorwrll]

So close.

[ElmerFudd]

So close.

We having a competition? :lol:

[CerebusOne]

There are all kinds of different stories. Some long and involved with intricate plots. Others short and hopefully sweet.

One kind of story that has to be done just right to work is the induction story. This kind of story really is bare of much plot, the induction is the plot. If you don't do it right...…….

And Greyscribbler returns with a vengeance with his story On a Train to show how great an induction story can be if it is done just so. And man does he do it here to perfection.

It's a once act, one scene play on a train car with Linda the rider, Alice the controller and a very tasty muffin.


Scribbler has a great facility for describing how a subject is broken down during various inductions and has shown it in so many of his great stories and in this one he is at the total top of his steaming hot game. The psychology Alice uses on Linda in conjunction with Linda's desire to eat a muffin is just so intricate and superb. And he takes her, and reader down that slippery slope, step by ever more steamy step. By the time this story ends you need to either take a cold shower....or do something else. But you gotta do something.

And I loved the ending too, with the muffin. So nice a way to bring the story around and to show that sometimes a muffin is important...until something better comes along.

Great job GreyScribbler. Just an object lesson in how to write an induction story in a flawless manner both in style, content and hotness. It's a ten. You missed nothing here which means we the readers didn't either. Thanks!

[wizzy]

Succubus’ Folly  and Master PC — Conditional Slavery are interesting new takes.

Enjoyed the ending to There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office

[Majorwrll]

So close.

We having a competition? :lol:

No I was just waiting and I looked away for about 5 minutes and was too late.

[me-chan]

S.B.'s Corruption Games fulfills something I was hoping would be expanded upon from the last update. Alexandra's call to her contact was a fun exchange. Watching them go through the motions and him react to the waking suggestions was, as the author called the subtitle, "the fun way." The cruel hangups followed by the triggering commands, I envied and pitied Jeremy all at once. Looking forward to Alexandra's next plan of attack.

The Girls of S.L.E.E.P. continue to build on Sleepy Hypno's world, now with a veteran hypnotist taking on a new subject, though I wonder how things would've gone with a different outcome of the coin toss. I like how Laura wasted no time in applying her craft and not letting Cheyenne have a chance to delve into more pessimism. A nice, easy to visualize induction followed by a sweet little transformation for her new "pet". One of the best sorority inductions I've seen, and hope there's more to come in this series.

Jennifer Lost the War was a hot little programming story. Miss Maura seems pretty smart to take her time getting to the detective, and making her true target just as happy as Jennifer. Definitely the kind of foil I like in detective stories, especially in the implied way of keeping the chase going after.

Looking at Her Differently was a little bit of a surprise for me. A great first story for a new author to MCStories, and a hypno story that takes it all the way back to using scripts to induce, which seems kind of rare to me now. Love the interaction between the couple, and how experimental, fun, and plausible it all seems. Definitely seems like a fun experience to be had, like it was to read.

Greyscribbler's On a Train was quite the random encounter for Linda and Alice. I've had occasional purchases like that muffin, and someone dissuading me from it the way Alice does it, intuitively guessing everything before and giving constructive thoughts on feelings and solutions, kind of easy to see how Linda fell like she did. This would be a perfect dieting program of sorts somewhere.

Pact by Meleva was an interesting look into a new part of the author's world. Truth seems like an interesting name for someone with her kind of powers. And with her being reluctant about them, it's nice to see the internal struggle going on between resisting and giving in to the temptation to make others submit to her judgement. Love the details and world-building like usual from Meleva, and I imagine following this story will be a joy to see where elements and Truth's power/journey will take her.

[walter_kovacs]

Succubus' Folly, by Anostus

A fun little romp. I do always enjoy the intersection of modern technology with fantasy and the reversal of fortune theme is a nice one. Conceptually strong. If it continues, I hope we get more detail on the powers in question and so on, but it's probably just a one-shot. Worth a read.

Enjoyed the ending to There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office

Thanks, feels good to finish something so I'm glad you enjoyed it 

[Lycanthrope]

Binding Rings (mc mf md in) (1 new chapter)  by Sidia
A chance discovery changes a young man’s life—and not always for the better.

I'm still following this story and liking how it's developing. Well written.


Master PC — Conditional Slavery (mc mf md gr) (new)  by Yaya
A strange man wants Heidi to be his slave. She refuses, but he has some conditions to offer that are quite irresistible.

Very creative and hot variation of the Master PC franchise. Exceptionally well written. I'm glad to see others reviewing it, too. After last week I wondered if maybe the Master PC trope had jumped the shark. Nope, it's still good!

[321]

Really enjoyed Greyscribbler's On a Train. Although... where are the other 37 chapters? 

I love how Alice jumps in and takes control right away. I'll have to remember that the next time I break down and get a muffin! 

[CerebusOne]

Really enjoyed Greyscribbler's On a Train. Although... where are the other 37 chapters? 

Lololol.

[BethanyP]

Another good week, and I'm really going to have to make more time to read. 

Right away, there's the wonderful Algorithm by Carefully Random, and this week's update was once again stellar.  Without giving too much away, it feels as if one arc of the story (sort of) wraps up neatly with a really wonderful twist ... but there's a sense that another bigger and even hotter shoe is going to drop, and soon.  I can't wait, and thank you Carefully Random!  (And yes, I did notice and love the little crossover bit with another of my favorite stories but I suppose saying any more than that constitutes a spoiler so enough said.)

I also really liked Blood on Parchment, by Doctor D.  It's not precisely the sort of thing I normally look for but the writing is so good and the scene set so well that I can't wait to see more of this one too.   Thank you!

I've not made it past the 'B's yet, as Algorithm has been making it easy (and worthwhile) to take the lazy way out and just start at the top, but there are a few more that look promising ...

[Shadra]

Right away, there's the wonderful Algorithm by Carefully Random, and this week's update was once again stellar.  Without giving too much away, it feels as if one arc of the story (sort of) wraps up neatly with a really wonderful twist ... but there's a sense that another bigger and even hotter shoe is going to drop, and soon.  I can't wait, and thank you Carefully Random!  (And yes, I did notice and love the little crossover bit with another of my favorite stories but I suppose saying any more than that constitutes a spoiler so enough said.)

 

I'll be sure to pass it along, glad you liked! (What an embarrassing typo that was)

[mr potestas]

Trapped (Mr. Scade) (mc ma ft) (new)  by Mr. Scade
She had trapped herself many years before, when she fed her fantasies and fetishes. She had become trapped, when the sight and smell and even thought of latex aroused her. She was trapped in this suit that kept changing, her, her mind, her life. Trapped and unable to escape. The latex was taking more and more of her.

Mr. Scade was always the kind of author that gave something different. As such, there never really is disappointment, even when the story isn't completely to your tastes. And well, Trapped was certainly different and hot! She was not in control, but fully aware of it. Well, I guess it was what she wanted! All that is all but forgetting to mention the wonderful yet almost subtle TF elements. I love Latex MC and TF, but inspiration to write such themes in their purest form come in fits and spurts. OK, fine, I've been on a kick involving demons with latex-like skin, but that is wildly different from this wonderful story. Hot, quick, vivid. This was near perfection!

[Geo]

 Master PC — Conditional Slavery has one of the best breast expansion sequences I've read in years. Kudos to Yaya.

[mr potestas]

Succubus’ Folly (mc mf md) (new)  by Anostus
Spectra is an ancient and powerful succubus. What chance does an apprentice summoner have against her?

What was amusing here, beyond the modern day twist, was just how cocky this Succubus was. Well, we get the impression that she normally found a way to "win," so it probably was not unfounded. Spectra was still a fun Succubus, as all Succubi should be, whether good, evil, somewhere in between. I weak, I probably would've given into her playful charms right away! The young apprentice reminded me of sudo-engineer Steven, son of a feudal lord, in the film Flesh+Blood. Not everything he did worked perfectly either, but being pushed in just the right way led to some genuinely impressive and cerebral tactics, leading to his arguable victory. I suppose the "hero" here won more definitively than Steven! This was a fun character driven piece.

[Svengli]

There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee
After a system update at work, Jenna starts to notice the increasingly unusual behaviour of her coworkers.

Only after the new chapters did I read this. I prefer "Cabal Diabolique", convert control and similar stories and I think this stands with some of my favorites; "Sleep Time", "Around her neck", "The Acts: The Shutdown", "The Adjustors", "For The People", "Wildlife" and so-forth.

The premise and pacing were good, the writing is good, the alternation between ordinary thoughts and conditioned-thoughts worked well. The ending was quite nice.

[InternetBuyer]

I Hate My Master (mc mm) (2 new chapters)  by maxrpotter
Mark moves in with a new roommate, and finds himself getting annoyed by a few small things about him, like when he leaves dishes in the sink, or when he leaves his clothes around the place, or when he gives Mark orders that he is unable to disobey.

Really loving this series, such a great idea, unfortunately I'm finding it's getting a little repetitive at this point. Less ruining of lives and more just blowing people every 5 minutes. Would love to see it move in a new direction or even a new series all together. Maybe something like this within a household or something.

Edit: Messing with the title's colour as it's un-readable in the quote-section.

[walter_kovacs]

Alter-Right (mc mf fd) (new)  by Ozhojabbe
Ethan eats, breathes and sleeps the Intellectual Dark Web, but Cassie might have something to say about that.

Well written and worth reading. It wasn't quite the story I hoped it would be, but that's an unfair burden to judge any work by - this is good on it's own merits. I will, nevertheless discuss something that it made me think about, which relates to an ongoing discussion that crops up from time to time on the forums.

This one takes a swerve and has a happy ending, but arguably I think the pre-swerve status quo was much more enticing, and were the strongest parts of the story. Politics related MC stories tend to take the form of "Feminist/Progressive woman is turned into a Submissive/Conservative/Ultra Traditionalist woman". There are a variety of reasons why that's a common theme of course. There's a long term precedent via Stepford Wives. Making people act against their own interests is quite hot to a lot of people and since most subjects tend to be women in archive stories, that dovetails thematically. Nevertheless, the inversion of this story is an appealing and interesting direction to take things. I believe For The People is a story where people raised this as a point, and in some ways Alter-Right answers the call on that front, but arguably does not explore it as deeply as I think the idea merits. I would really love to see another story take this idea and run with it a bit more long-form, or even for the story as it exists to continue on and take up that theme with other characters outside of the two in the chapter we have.

If the idea remains under-explored I may write a story with that theme myself, although my preference is always to be lazy and have someone else do the hard work for me 

There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee
After a system update at work, Jenna starts to notice the increasingly unusual behaviour of her coworkers.

Only after the new chapters did I read this. I prefer "Cabal Diabolique", convert control and similar stories and I think this stands with some of my favorites; "Sleep Time", "Around her neck", "The Acts: The Shutdown", "The Adjustors", "For The People", "Wildlife" and so-forth.

The premise and pacing were good, the writing is good, the alternation between ordinary thoughts and conditioned-thoughts worked well. The ending was quite nice.

Thank you, the comparisons are high praise. If there are aspects of the story you thought worked well and you'd like to see more of, or things that didn't work well and you'd like to see less of, let me know and I'll take it into account for my future stories. I know Lost likes lingerie so I'll definitely be throwing some of that in at some point 

[Devious_Bastard]

Master's Mark by newcomer Third Leprechaun really pushed the right buttons for me. I love that quick and all-powerful mental domination and I love the emphasis on screwing with people as opposed to screwing people.

[321]

Another amazing chapter of Algorithm. I did NOT see that twist coming! There's no telling how this will wrap up now, with so many loose pieces on the board, but at least we'll all find out next week! 

Finally got around to reading There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office and I have to say, I enjoyed this fun and slightly ridiculous take on an old mind control trope. We're let in on the joke fairly early, but the payoff is still satisfying. A great job from... wait a second... Alan Smithee? Okay, which one of you wrote this story?!?!?

Wildwood, on the other hand, continues to serve up a serious and very intriguing mind control mystery. We know a bit about what's going on- at least, it seems that we do- but what happens to all of our characters is another matter. Here's to more brainwashing and secret trigger phrases, woo hoo!

The Girls of S.L.E.E.P. continue their head-to-head matchups with fun, sexy results. A couple of good winks at the camera for good measure. Bring on Round 3!

House of Hypnosis reminded me of a story I've been working on. ("It's got good bones!") I do hope that we get to see more of this, so that we can learn more about the realtor and the house.

[3rdLeprechaun]

Master's Mark by newcomer Third Leprechaun really pushed the right buttons for me. I love that quick and all-powerful mental domination and I love the emphasis on screwing with people as opposed to screwing people.

Thank you, Devious! I'm glad someone enjoyed it. I am a long-time lurker of this site, but first-time author. I intend to write more, so any feedback or constructive criticism is *greatly* appreciated. 

[sleepyhypno]

The Girls of S.L.E.E.P. continue their head-to-head matchups with fun, sexy results. A couple of good winks at the camera for good measure. Bring on Round 3!

I'm glad you liked the stories!   And the fourth wall breaks.

[Mr.Scade]

Trapped (Mr. Scade) (mc ma ft) (new)  by Mr. Scade
She had trapped herself many years before, when she fed her fantasies and fetishes. She had become trapped, when the sight and smell and even thought of latex aroused her. She was trapped in this suit that kept changing, her, her mind, her life. Trapped and unable to escape. The latex was taking more and more of her.

Mr. Scade was always the kind of author that gave something different. As such, there never really is disappointment, even when the story isn't completely to your tastes. And well, Trapped was certainly different and hot! She was not in control, but fully aware of it. Well, I guess it was what she wanted! All that is all but forgetting to mention the wonderful yet almost subtle TF elements. I love Latex MC and TF, but inspiration to write such themes in their purest form come in fits and spurts. OK, fine, I've been on a kick involving demons with latex-like skin, but that is wildly different from this wonderful story. Hot, quick, vivid. This was near perfection!

Oh man, oh man, oh man!

This made my morning. Yes, shower me with earned praise! Thanks, thanks thanks!

[3rdLeprechaun]

Want to give a shout out to On A Train. That was an extremely well done and creative induction. Good job.

[SB]

S.B.'s Corruption Games fulfills something I was hoping would be expanded upon from the last update. Alexandra's call to her contact was a fun exchange. Watching them go through the motions and him react to the waking suggestions was, as the author called the subtitle, "the fun way." The cruel hangups followed by the triggering commands, I envied and pitied Jeremy all at once. Looking forward to Alexandra's next plan of attack.

Glad you enjoyed where things went this time around and know that Alexandra likes you, too. In fact, don't be surprised if she drops by for a visit soon. 

[Shadra]

Been a rough week, so I didn't get around to commenting on the stories I have read just yet. Will probably read a few more today, but perhaps it's better to get some reviews out of the before I start mixing stories up in my head.

Going alphabetically, it's probably no surprise that I greatly enjoyed this chapter of Algorithm. It's not easy for me to get emotional over a story, but this chapter sure did it! Even the second time through was a bit of a tear-jerker for that one scene. And then of course the hot scenes that followed... As this arc comes to a close, I'm really curious where the final arc of the story takes us, but I'm sure it's going to be just as good. And yes, those two little words definitely brought a smile to my face!

I often decide what stories to read based on the very reviews here, and Blood on Parchment was the first of those. The story is very well written, and I'm sure anyone that is a fan of vampire stories will very well enjoy it.

Next up, and another recommendation from her, we have Master PC - Conditional Slavery. Admittedly I'm not very familiar with the Master PC universe. I know the basics, and of course what I learned from reading this story. Fantastic style from a new author, I have to say. Much of the content didn't appeal to me directly, but I still found the story quite interesting, and found it very unique, even if that's due to me not reading much in the universe. I do have two thoughts about it, but I'll leave that in the spoilers below.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Next up, we have the thrilling conclusion to Office Story With Huge Title! I greatly enjoyed this story, and am partly sad to see it end. Fantastic submission for a first time author! Definitely one for me to keep an eye on going forward. While I expected things would have played out the way they did, it was actually a reversal of characters of what I was thinking. And then the huge twist that explained how Jenna was able to do all the things... very clever! I don't usually reread stories, but I'm tempted to go back to the beginning to see things in this new context. Either way, I look forward to any future story you may submit!

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

While I'm still holding out hope to see a continuation of Fascination Uniform, I did take a look at Trapped. The writing is well done, and the story is well told. Has some themes that I enjoy, but overall didn't do much for me. I think perhaps if it was longer, gave more time to connect with the character, I would have enjoyed more.

Last one for this post, I started Wildwood at the recommendation of another author. Really enjoy seeing things play out. There are many players in this story, allowing for a gripping tale that has me wondering where things will go. There are of course many things I hope to see! Not much to say other than I really hope to have another two chapters next week!

That's all for now. Maybe have some more read by the end of the day, but probably won't have another post right away.

[walter_kovacs]

Next up, we have the thrilling conclusion to Office Story With Huge Title! I greatly enjoyed this story, and am partly sad to see it end. Fantastic submission for a first time author! Definitely one for me to keep an eye on going forward. While I expected things would have played out the way they did, it was actually a reversal of characters of what I was thinking. And then the huge twist that explained how Jenna was able to do all the things... very clever! I don't usually reread stories, but I'm tempted to go back to the beginning to see things in this new context. Either way, I look forward to any future story you may submit!

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

I'm very happy you've enjoyed it, thank you greatly for the write up!

Regarding your question in the spoiler tags:

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

That reminds me, I will have to add in a little thanks section to Merry and Geo for proofreading and providing feedback on the initial draft!

[badpenny]

Alter-Right (mc mf fd) (new)  by Ozhojabbe
Ethan eats, breathes and sleeps the Intellectual Dark Web, but Cassie might have something to say about that.

Well written and worth reading. It wasn't quite the story I hoped it would be, but that's an unfair burden to judge any work by - this is good on it's own merits. I will, nevertheless discuss something that it made me think about, which relates to an ongoing discussion that crops up from time to time on the forums.

This one takes a swerve and has a happy ending, but arguably I think the pre-swerve status quo was much more enticing, and were the strongest parts of the story. Politics related MC stories tend to take the form of "Feminist/Progressive woman is turned into a Submissive/Conservative/Ultra Traditionalist woman". There are a variety of reasons why that's a common theme of course. There's a long term precedent via Stepford Wives. Making people act against their own interests is quite hot to a lot of people and since most subjects tend to be women in archive stories, that dovetails thematically. Nevertheless, the inversion of this story is an appealing and interesting direction to take things. I believe For The People is a story where people raised this as a point, and in some ways Alter-Right answers the call on that front, but arguably does not explore it as deeply as I think the idea merits. I would really love to see another story take this idea and run with it a bit more long-form, or even for the story as it exists to continue on and take up that theme with other characters outside of the two in the chapter we have.

If the idea remains under-explored I may write a story with that theme myself, although my preference is always to be lazy and have someone else do the hard work for me 

So the synopsis of Alter-Right promoted me to put it in my "hmm, second pass through" mental stack (since I'm unfamiliar with the author), but this review bumped it up to a first pass read. I'm on record on enjoying unapologetically dark stories. As walter_kovacs mentions, this one takes a swerve. Up until it, I was enjoying Ethan's takedown. There's something delicious about revenge fantasies, and the tagging and synopsis had me all excited about what Cassie was planning. And then...the swerve.

The rest of my comments are spoilery, so behind the tag they go:

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Like walter_kovacs, I'd love to see a longer exploration of this idea. There's a lot to unpack with the overarching characterizations of both Ethan and Cassie. There's a part of me that wants to say Ozhojabbe sold this story a little short, but it's written with a firm enough hand that when I step back and try to take a more objective look at it, I'm left convinced Ozhojabbe told the story they set out to write, and my complaints are more of a result of my tastes of a reader not lining up with the author's vision.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

And speaking of walter_kovacs, I've finally had a chance to catch up with There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee. I have many favorite flavors of MD stories, and this one hits a number of them.

First, I love the pacing.The chapter breaks feel natural, and I love how Jenna's aware Something Is Not Right in the early chapters while everyone around her is convinced Everything Is Right. That makes for the type of internal character conflict that I love, especially in MD stories. Because of course Jenna starts to give in, and of course it's delicious. I love how inevitable everything feels, and how the entire narrative is infused with the sense of sensual dread based on careful word choices. A lot of care went into crafting the story. It's nearly invisible, but since I ended up reading it with a reviewing eye, I spotted a number of stand-alone word choices that made me think "yes, yes, you put serious though into the language you used in this story to guide readers to a certain feeling."

(I hope I found my way to the right feeling. Even I didn't, it was the right feeling for me for this story, so that's enough of a win for me.)

This is a wonderful debut story and I look forward to future offerings!

[oshojabbe]

Alter-Right: Well written and worth reading. It wasn't quite the story I hoped it would be, but that's an unfair burden to judge any work by - this is good on it's own merits. I will, nevertheless discuss something that it made me think about, which relates to an ongoing discussion that crops up from time to time on the forums. [snip]

I'm glad you found the story worth reading!

[...] And then...the swerve. [snip] So in the end, the execution fell flat for me, much like a semi-sweet'semi-dry wine that can't bother to commit to either end of the spectrum. Middle of the road stuff rarely satisfies me, and this story comes across as firmly middle of the road to me.
[snip] There's a part of me that wants to say Ozhojabbe sold this story a little short, but it's written with a firm enough hand that when I step back and try to take a more objective look at it, I'm left convinced Ozhojabbe told the story they set out to write, and my complaints are more of a result of my tastes of a reader not lining up with the author's vision.

Thanks for the feedback! I definitely can see where you're coming from. It's definitely a tricky tightrope to walk - writing a story with a swerve, and I'm quite conscious of how easy it is to lose the audience.

While our tastes do possibly differ, I still value feedback like yours because it gives me ideas for how to experiment with stories in the future.

Politics related MC stories tend to take the form of "Feminist/Progressive woman is turned into a Submissive/Conservative/Ultra Traditionalist woman". [...] Nevertheless, the inversion of this story is an appealing and interesting direction to take things.I would really love to see another story take this idea and run with it a bit more long-form, or even for the story as it exists to continue on and take up that theme with other characters outside of the two in the chapter we have.

Like walter_kovacs, I'd love to see a longer exploration of this idea.

I definitely think it's an underutilized subgenre of MC fiction. I'd love to see more people exploring this type of inversion of well-worn tropes. While I think I'm done with Cassie and Ethan, I might see about doing more with this idea in the future.

[walter_kovacs]

And speaking of walter_kovacs, I've finally had a chance to catch up with There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee. I have many favorite flavors of MD stories, and this one hits a number of them.

First, I love the pacing.The chapter breaks feel natural, and I love how Jenna's aware Something Is Not Right in the early chapters while everyone around her is convinced Everything Is Right. That makes for the type of internal character conflict that I love, especially in MD stories. Because of course Jenna starts to give in, and of course it's delicious. I love how inevitable everything feels, and how the entire narrative is infused with the sense of sensual dread based on careful word choices. A lot of care went into crafting the story. It's nearly invisible, but since I ended up reading it with a reviewing eye, I spotted a number of stand-alone word choices that made me think "yes, yes, you put serious though into the language you used in this story to guide readers to a certain feeling."

(I hope I found my way to the right feeling. Even I didn't, it was the right feeling for me for this story, so that's enough of a win for me.)

This is a wonderful debut story and I look forward to future offerings!

I'm blushing from all these supportive comments, so thank you and everyone else who has chimed in.

Sensual dread is not a phrase I've ever heard before, but I love it. I think your read on this is quite insightful. When writing, I was thinking in terms of Hitchcockian suspense - a metaphorical bomb is under the table, and the audience can see it as clear as day, but the characters sitting at the table do not. Similarly, aspects of the story are apparent to the reader but not to Jenna. Word choice and repetition were definitely on my mind as well.

I definitely think it's an underutilized subgenre of MC fiction. I'd love to see more people exploring this type of inversion of well-worn tropes. While I think I'm done with Cassie and Ethan, I might see about doing more with this idea in the future.

I think I'm now very onboard with the idea of taking a little spin at it too, so thank you for writing it and I look forward to seeing what you might also do with it in the future 

[Mr.Scade]

While I'm still holding out hope to see a continuation of Fascination Uniform, I did take a look at Trapped. The writing is well done, and the story is well told. Has some themes that I enjoy, but overall didn't do much for me. I think perhaps if it was longer, gave more time to connect with the character, I would have enjoyed more.

 I hope that I'll be able to continue it, especially now that there's some ideas... that have evolved there.

 Thanks for the praise. Thanks for the criticism.

[greyscribbler]

And Greyscribbler returns with a vengeance with his story On a Train to show how great an induction story can be if it is done just so. And man does he do it here to perfection.

It's a once act, one scene play on a train car with Linda the rider, Alice the controller and a very tasty muffin.


Scribbler has a great facility for describing how a subject is broken down during various inductions and has shown it in so many of his great stories and in this one he is at the total top of his steaming hot game. The psychology Alice uses on Linda in conjunction with Linda's desire to eat a muffin is just so intricate and superb. And he takes her, and reader down that slippery slope, step by ever more steamy step. By the time this story ends you need to either take a cold shower....or do something else. But you gotta do something.

And I loved the ending too, with the muffin. So nice a way to bring the story around and to show that sometimes a muffin is important...until something better comes along.

Great job GreyScribbler. Just an object lesson in how to write an induction story in a flawless manner both in style, content and hotness. It's a ten. You missed nothing here which means we the readers didn't either. Thanks!

Thanks CerebusOne.  Glad you liked it.  It was part of my continued attempts to write something short.  I don't think Linda is going to be eating too many more muffins.

Greyscribbler

[greyscribbler]

Greyscribbler's On a Train was quite the random encounter for Linda and Alice. I've had occasional purchases like that muffin, and someone dissuading me from it the way Alice does it, intuitively guessing everything before and giving constructive thoughts on feelings and solutions, kind of easy to see how Linda fell like she did. This would be a perfect dieting program of sorts somewhere.

Thanks me-chan. Glad you liked it.  Alice wwas happy to use what she had.

Greyscribbler

[greyscribbler]

Really enjoyed Greyscribbler's On a Train. Although... where are the other 37 chapters? 

I love how Alice jumps in and takes control right away. I'll have to remember that the next time I break down and get a muffin!

Thanks 321.  As to the other 37?  Well, it is the same Alice from Exposed, so there's another three chapters.  And I do have other stories in mind for Alice, so ...

Greyscribbler

[greyscribbler]

Want to give a shout out to On A Train. That was an extremely well done and creative induction. Good job.

Thanks 3rdLeprechaun. Glad you liked it.

Greyscribbler

[badpenny]

Thanks for the feedback! I definitely can see where you're coming from. It's definitely a tricky tightrope to walk - writing a story with a swerve, and I'm quite conscious of how easy it is to lose the audience.

While our tastes do possibly differ, I still value feedback like yours because it gives me ideas for how to experiment with stories in the future.

Well, they differed a bit on this story. I just finished reading Sororal Devotion, and that one was very much a hit. I look forward to diving into Empty Heads and look forward to seeing new stories!

Back to this update:
Where Everybody Knows Your Name (mc mf md) (new)  by Chrystal Wynd

I originally reviewed this during Khaki's. April 2019 Arena Event (Ka-Ka Land). But I couldn't resist re-reading it now that it's on the archive. I still love how Elliot rolls with all the magical weirdness in the The Electric Raven because it's normal. I got a kick out of his reaction to both watching the game between the mysterious figures and being pulled in as an (involuntary) participant. The story's just as fun on a second read-through.

Trapped (Mr. Scade) (mc ma ft) (new)  by Mr. Scade

I'm always mesmerized by Mr. Scade's stories. This one is no exception. I love it starts well past the part of the victim being trapped, how the dehumanization is just complete enough that she honestly can't recall her name but can recall certain snippets of her past life so she's aware of what she's surrendering but too far gone to truly care.

[Chrystal Wynd]

Penny, you rock! Thank you for the review.  😁

[Shadra]

So many stories to read this week... This may be my last set, though.

Starting with Alter-Right, I really enjoyed the premise. Changes in perception or belief, as shown here, is one of the more enjoyable styles of MC, I find. Unfortunately, the execution kind of killed it for me. Also a bit embarrassed to admit, not sure I understood the last scene. Either way, concept was fun, and I still enjoyed the little twist a bit after the middle.

One of the reviews here for Corruption Games got me interested. I did have to go back and catch up, but thankfully the chapters are short enough that it wasn't at all an issue. Green stories aren't quite my forte, but I'm really enjoying the story nonetheless! Since chapter one is new to me, I'd also like to say I had fun deciphering the code on my own. I wonder how many others were able to read that sentence before they knew how it was scrambled? Was a bit tikrcy, but not uklnie slmracnig the mdilde ltretes in a wrod and slitl bneig albe to raed tehm. Eager to see where this story goes! Any story with a sexy woman in a latex catsuit gets a thumbs up in my book.

The Girls of Sleep continues to entertain with such a lighthearted tone that is quite a breath of fresh air, at times. I like my stories to have a bit of drama, but it's nice to get a break from that every now and then with such fun pieces as this. Can't wait to see what the next induction will be like, and what the victimpartner is compelled to do!

It's getting hard to remember what I reviewed already or not! I do believe Jennifer Lost The War is up next. Anybody else hear The Offspring in their head while reading this? No small surprise that a Jukebox story is well told. Quite a hot story, and if I were to give one criticism, it's that it wasn't longer. Would really like to see what might happen next, but those two words at the end of the story, and the middle of this sentence, say it's not going to happen. Shame, but would still recommend!

What better way to celebrate the spoopiest of months than by reading the not-so-spoopy story A New Treat! A delightful little short -- about as short as it can be! -- but such great fun. I hope those two really have an amazing rest of the night! I'll have to remind myself later, but it seems the author has a similar story involving that divine candy...

So much praise for On A Train, I of course had to check it out myself. No need to repeat what everyone else has said, so I'll just say that the other reviews are spot on, and if they don't entice you into reading, well... your loss I suppose!

Lastly, there's Succubus' Folly. This story did not go the way I expected! And that's usually a good thing, as is this case. Nice little tale of transformation. Admittedly, would have liked to see some of Spectra's old self return in some way, but the new her does seem so adorable, I can't really complain. Definitely leaves room for related tales in the universe, and I'm interested enough in this one to consider checking them out, should the author continue.

All I had time for today. May get another story or two in before the next update... but hard to say. I usually don't get around to many stories, certainly not this many, this often.

[jmichaels]

CW, I follow you on Tumblr and I'm loving how you're expanding Crystal Heights' various locations, from the various clubs of The Zone to these lesser known venues like The Electric Raven. The crazy, never know what to expect next, aspect of your well crafted universe makes each of your stories a wild ride.

[Chrystal Wynd]

Thanks, jmichaels! I appreciate your saying so. And thanks for the Tumblr mention as well. If you want to see all my posts from before the Tumblr purge, (the x-rated stuff), I'm also on bdsmlr dot com.

[oshojabbe]

Starting with Alter-Right, I really enjoyed the premise. Changes in perception or belief, as shown here, is one of the more enjoyable styles of MC, I find. Unfortunately, the execution kind of killed it for me. Also a bit embarrassed to admit, not sure I understood the last scene. Either way, concept was fun, and I still enjoyed the little twist a bit after the middle.

Thank you for the feedback. You're the third person in this thread with this kind of critique, so I'll have to be more mindful of how I write things like this in the future.

Regarding the last scene, I intended it to imply that Cassie had hypnotized herself as part of role-play, and since she had forgotten her phone when leaving, she wasn't going to get the trigger to unhypnotize herself - mirroring what happened to Ethan somewhat.

However, I firmly believe in death of the author and another valid interpretation of the story supported by the text is that  Cassie's attitude at the end is who she really is. And her forgetting her phone could be hinting at Ethan somehow turning the tables on her.

(In retrospect, the reason for the ambiguity is that we never see things from Cassie's perspective before this point, plus the story is always third person limited. So it's not 100% clear how things actually were a week before the story started. If Ethan didn't actually lose a hypnosis bet, then the interpretation where Cassie is manipulative becomes more likely. If Ethan did lose a hypnosis bet, then the interpretation where Cassie is hypnotized and missing a trigger is more likely.)

[Fortunato]

Just wanted to pop in and say that I've not been reading much lately, but I did take a look over Savannah's Hypnotic Socks and like the servitude aspect that started to come into play. I'm hoping there's another update this week.

-Fortunato

[greyscribbler]

So much praise for On A Train, I of course had to check it out myself. No need to repeat what everyone else has said, so I'll just say that the other reviews are spot on, and if they don't entice you into reading, well... your loss I suppose!

Thanks Shadra, glad you liked it.

Greyscribbler

[mr potestas]

Properly Handled (mc mf ff md fd in) (2 new chapters)  by ExodusRex
A brother and sister grow closer over a shared love of mind control and other various kinks and perversions.

It's great to see this up and running again after a brief hiatus. Did need a mental catch up, but whatever. Its truly remarkable how they all evolved up to this point. Perhaps they forced to bloom what was already there: the voyeurism, the aggression. A really hot and detailed update here! It's not always clear what is happening, but that is the point. The layers of MC are wonderfully mind-bending. Of course, it would seem the end is nigh ...

[SB]

One of the reviews here for Corruption Games got me interested. I did have to go back and catch up, but thankfully the chapters are short enough that it wasn't at all an issue. Green stories aren't quite my forte, but I'm really enjoying the story nonetheless! Since chapter one is new to me, I'd also like to say I had fun deciphering the code on my own. I wonder how many others were able to read that sentence before they knew how it was scrambled? Was a bit tikrcy, but not uklnie slmracnig the mdilde ltretes in a wrod and slitl bneig albe to raed tehm. Eager to see where this story goes! Any story with a sexy woman in a latex catsuit gets a thumbs up in my book.

Only catching up now - where's that follow topic button? - but thanks. Alexandra is a fun character to write. Always glad when someone enjoys something green out of me especially after saying green stories aren't their forte. Lots of surprises in store but it's going to take a while to get through them all. I hope you continue to have fun with it.