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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by walter_kovacs on October 03, 2019, 07:14:33 am »
And speaking of walter_kovacs, I've finally had a chance to catch up with There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee. I have many favorite flavors of MD stories, and this one hits a number of them.

First, I love the pacing.The chapter breaks feel natural, and I love how Jenna's aware Something Is Not Right in the early chapters while everyone around her is convinced Everything Is Right. That makes for the type of internal character conflict that I love, especially in MD stories. Because of course Jenna starts to give in, and of course it's delicious. I love how inevitable everything feels, and how the entire narrative is infused with the sense of sensual dread based on careful word choices. A lot of care went into crafting the story. It's nearly invisible, but since I ended up reading it with a reviewing eye, I spotted a number of stand-alone word choices that made me think "yes, yes, you put serious though into the language you used in this story to guide readers to a certain feeling."

(I hope I found my way to the right feeling. Even I didn't, it was the right feeling for me for this story, so that's enough of a win for me.)

This is a wonderful debut story and I look forward to future offerings!

I'm blushing from all these supportive comments, so thank you and everyone else who has chimed in.

Sensual dread is not a phrase I've ever heard before, but I love it. I think your read on this is quite insightful. When writing, I was thinking in terms of Hitchcockian suspense - a metaphorical bomb is under the table, and the audience can see it as clear as day, but the characters sitting at the table do not. Similarly, aspects of the story are apparent to the reader but not to Jenna. Word choice and repetition were definitely on my mind as well.


I definitely think it's an underutilized subgenre of MC fiction. I'd love to see more people exploring this type of inversion of well-worn tropes. While I think I'm done with Cassie and Ethan, I might see about doing more with this idea in the future.

I think I'm now very onboard with the idea of taking a little spin at it too, so thank you for writing it and I look forward to seeing what you might also do with it in the future  >:D
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by oshojabbe on October 03, 2019, 12:19:25 am »
Alter-Right: Well written and worth reading. It wasn't quite the story I hoped it would be, but that's an unfair burden to judge any work by - this is good on it's own merits. I will, nevertheless discuss something that it made me think about, which relates to an ongoing discussion that crops up from time to time on the forums. [snip]

I'm glad you found the story worth reading!

[...] And then...the swerve. [snip] So in the end, the execution fell flat for me, much like a semi-sweet'semi-dry wine that can't bother to commit to either end of the spectrum. Middle of the road stuff rarely satisfies me, and this story comes across as firmly middle of the road to me.
[snip] There's a part of me that wants to say Ozhojabbe sold this story a little short, but it's written with a firm enough hand that when I step back and try to take a more objective look at it, I'm left convinced Ozhojabbe told the story they set out to write, and my complaints are more of a result of my tastes of a reader not lining up with the author's vision.

Thanks for the feedback! I definitely can see where you're coming from. It's definitely a tricky tightrope to walk - writing a story with a swerve, and I'm quite conscious of how easy it is to lose the audience.

While our tastes do possibly differ, I still value feedback like yours because it gives me ideas for how to experiment with stories in the future.

Politics related MC stories tend to take the form of "Feminist/Progressive woman is turned into a Submissive/Conservative/Ultra Traditionalist woman". [...] Nevertheless, the inversion of this story is an appealing and interesting direction to take things.I would really love to see another story take this idea and run with it a bit more long-form, or even for the story as it exists to continue on and take up that theme with other characters outside of the two in the chapter we have.

Like walter_kovacs, I'd love to see a longer exploration of this idea.

I definitely think it's an underutilized subgenre of MC fiction. I'd love to see more people exploring this type of inversion of well-worn tropes. While I think I'm done with Cassie and Ethan, I might see about doing more with this idea in the future.
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by badpenny on October 02, 2019, 09:20:23 pm »
Quote
Alter-Right (mc mf fd) (new)  by Ozhojabbe
Ethan eats, breathes and sleeps the Intellectual Dark Web, but Cassie might have something to say about that.

Well written and worth reading. It wasn't quite the story I hoped it would be, but that's an unfair burden to judge any work by - this is good on it's own merits. I will, nevertheless discuss something that it made me think about, which relates to an ongoing discussion that crops up from time to time on the forums.

This one takes a swerve and has a happy ending, but arguably I think the pre-swerve status quo was much more enticing, and were the strongest parts of the story. Politics related MC stories tend to take the form of "Feminist/Progressive woman is turned into a Submissive/Conservative/Ultra Traditionalist woman". There are a variety of reasons why that's a common theme of course. There's a long term precedent via Stepford Wives. Making people act against their own interests is quite hot to a lot of people and since most subjects tend to be women in archive stories, that dovetails thematically. Nevertheless, the inversion of this story is an appealing and interesting direction to take things. I believe For The People is a story where people raised this as a point, and in some ways Alter-Right answers the call on that front, but arguably does not explore it as deeply as I think the idea merits. I would really love to see another story take this idea and run with it a bit more long-form, or even for the story as it exists to continue on and take up that theme with other characters outside of the two in the chapter we have.

If the idea remains under-explored I may write a story with that theme myself, although my preference is always to be lazy and have someone else do the hard work for me  :grin:

So the synopsis of Alter-Right promoted me to put it in my "hmm, second pass through" mental stack (since I'm unfamiliar with the author), but this review bumped it up to a first pass read. I'm on record on enjoying unapologetically dark stories. As walter_kovacs mentions, this one takes a swerve. Up until it, I was enjoying Ethan's takedown. There's something delicious about revenge fantasies, and the tagging and synopsis had me all excited about what Cassie was planning. And then...the swerve.

The rest of my comments are spoilery, so behind the tag they go:
Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Like walter_kovacs, I'd love to see a longer exploration of this idea. There's a lot to unpack with the overarching characterizations of both Ethan and Cassie. There's a part of me that wants to say Ozhojabbe sold this story a little short, but it's written with a firm enough hand that when I step back and try to take a more objective look at it, I'm left convinced Ozhojabbe told the story they set out to write, and my complaints are more of a result of my tastes of a reader not lining up with the author's vision.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

And speaking of walter_kovacs, I've finally had a chance to catch up with There Was Something Strange Going On At The Office (mc mf md) (2 new chapters)  by Alan Smithee. I have many favorite flavors of MD stories, and this one hits a number of them.

First, I love the pacing.The chapter breaks feel natural, and I love how Jenna's aware Something Is Not Right in the early chapters while everyone around her is convinced Everything Is Right. That makes for the type of internal character conflict that I love, especially in MD stories. Because of course Jenna starts to give in, and of course it's delicious. I love how inevitable everything feels, and how the entire narrative is infused with the sense of sensual dread based on careful word choices. A lot of care went into crafting the story. It's nearly invisible, but since I ended up reading it with a reviewing eye, I spotted a number of stand-alone word choices that made me think "yes, yes, you put serious though into the language you used in this story to guide readers to a certain feeling."

(I hope I found my way to the right feeling. Even I didn't, it was the right feeling for me for this story, so that's enough of a win for me.)

This is a wonderful debut story and I look forward to future offerings!
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by walter_kovacs on October 02, 2019, 07:03:54 pm »
Next up, we have the thrilling conclusion to Office Story With Huge Title! I greatly enjoyed this story, and am partly sad to see it end. Fantastic submission for a first time author! Definitely one for me to keep an eye on going forward. While I expected things would have played out the way they did, it was actually a reversal of characters of what I was thinking. And then the huge twist that explained how Jenna was able to do all the things... very clever! I don't usually reread stories, but I'm tempted to go back to the beginning to see things in this new context. Either way, I look forward to any future story you may submit!

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.


I'm very happy you've enjoyed it, thank you greatly for the write up!

Regarding your question in the spoiler tags:

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

That reminds me, I will have to add in a little thanks section to Merry and Geo for proofreading and providing feedback on the initial draft!
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by Shadra on October 02, 2019, 05:41:28 pm »
Been a rough week, so I didn't get around to commenting on the stories I have read just yet. Will probably read a few more today, but perhaps it's better to get some reviews out of the before I start mixing stories up in my head.

Going alphabetically, it's probably no surprise that I greatly enjoyed this chapter of Algorithm. It's not easy for me to get emotional over a story, but this chapter sure did it! Even the second time through was a bit of a tear-jerker for that one scene. And then of course the hot scenes that followed... As this arc comes to a close, I'm really curious where the final arc of the story takes us, but I'm sure it's going to be just as good. And yes, those two little words definitely brought a smile to my face!

I often decide what stories to read based on the very reviews here, and Blood on Parchment was the first of those. The story is very well written, and I'm sure anyone that is a fan of vampire stories will very well enjoy it.

Next up, and another recommendation from her, we have Master PC - Conditional Slavery. Admittedly I'm not very familiar with the Master PC universe. I know the basics, and of course what I learned from reading this story. Fantastic style from a new author, I have to say. Much of the content didn't appeal to me directly, but I still found the story quite interesting, and found it very unique, even if that's due to me not reading much in the universe. I do have two thoughts about it, but I'll leave that in the spoilers below.

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

Next up, we have the thrilling conclusion to Office Story With Huge Title! I greatly enjoyed this story, and am partly sad to see it end. Fantastic submission for a first time author! Definitely one for me to keep an eye on going forward. While I expected things would have played out the way they did, it was actually a reversal of characters of what I was thinking. And then the huge twist that explained how Jenna was able to do all the things... very clever! I don't usually reread stories, but I'm tempted to go back to the beginning to see things in this new context. Either way, I look forward to any future story you may submit!

Sorry but you are not allowed to view spoiler contents.

While I'm still holding out hope to see a continuation of Fascination Uniform, I did take a look at Trapped. The writing is well done, and the story is well told. Has some themes that I enjoy, but overall didn't do much for me. I think perhaps if it was longer, gave more time to connect with the character, I would have enjoyed more.

Last one for this post, I started Wildwood at the recommendation of another author. Really enjoy seeing things play out. There are many players in this story, allowing for a gripping tale that has me wondering where things will go. There are of course many things I hope to see! Not much to say other than I really hope to have another two chapters next week!

That's all for now. Maybe have some more read by the end of the day, but probably won't have another post right away.
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by SB on October 02, 2019, 04:04:28 pm »
S.B.'s Corruption Games fulfills something I was hoping would be expanded upon from the last update. Alexandra's call to her contact was a fun exchange. Watching them go through the motions and him react to the waking suggestions was, as the author called the subtitle, "the fun way." The cruel hangups followed by the triggering commands, I envied and pitied Jeremy all at once. Looking forward to Alexandra's next plan of attack.


Glad you enjoyed where things went this time around and know that Alexandra likes you, too. In fact, don't be surprised if she drops by for a visit soon.  ;)
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by 3rdLeprechaun on October 02, 2019, 11:49:59 am »
Want to give a shout out to On A Train. That was an extremely well done and creative induction. Good job.
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by Mr.Scade on October 02, 2019, 02:25:57 am »
Trapped (Mr. Scade) (mc ma ft) (new)  by Mr. Scade
She had trapped herself many years before, when she fed her fantasies and fetishes. She had become trapped, when the sight and smell and even thought of latex aroused her. She was trapped in this suit that kept changing, her, her mind, her life. Trapped and unable to escape. The latex was taking more and more of her.

Mr. Scade was always the kind of author that gave something different. As such, there never really is disappointment, even when the story isn't completely to your tastes. And well, Trapped was certainly different and hot! She was not in control, but fully aware of it. Well, I guess it was what she wanted! All that is all but forgetting to mention the wonderful yet almost subtle TF elements. I love Latex MC and TF, but inspiration to write such themes in their purest form come in fits and spurts. OK, fine, I've been on a kick involving demons with latex-like skin, but that is wildly different from this wonderful story. Hot, quick, vivid. This was near perfection!

Oh man, oh man, oh man!

This made my morning. Yes, shower me with earned praise! Thanks, thanks thanks! :D
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by sleepyhypno on October 01, 2019, 04:04:48 am »
The Girls of S.L.E.E.P. continue their head-to-head matchups with fun, sexy results. A couple of good winks at the camera for good measure. Bring on Round 3!

I'm glad you liked the stories!   And the fourth wall breaks.
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2019 Update Archive / Re: New Releases-September 28th 2019
« Last post by 3rdLeprechaun on September 30, 2019, 09:07:17 pm »
Master's Mark by newcomer Third Leprechaun really pushed the right buttons for me. I love that quick and all-powerful mental domination and I love the emphasis on screwing with people as opposed to screwing people.

Thank you, Devious! I'm glad someone enjoyed it. I am a long-time lurker of this site, but first-time author. I intend to write more, so any feedback or constructive criticism is *greatly* appreciated.  :)
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